Embracing Solitude: How to Thrive When You’re Doing More Things Alone
- lafilledennui
- Mar 21
- 3 min read
There’s a growing conversation about how more people are eating alone—and how it might be impacting happiness. But let’s zoom out for a moment: it’s not just about meals. More people are also living alone, traveling solo, and spending time without the automatic presence of others. And while some see this as a problem to be solved, what if we looked at it differently? What if doing things alone wasn’t something to be feared, but something to embrace?
Alone Doesn’t Have to Mean Lonely
Loneliness and solitude are not the same thing. Loneliness is the ache of disconnection, the feeling of being unseen or unsupported. Solitude, on the other hand, can be an intentional, fulfilling experience. It’s about choosing your own company and making space for self-discovery, reflection, and independence. The way we frame being alone can make all the difference.
Instead of asking, Why am I doing this alone? try shifting to What can I enjoy about doing this on my own?
The Empowerment of Doing Things Solo
Eating Alone: A Chance to Savor. Many people associate eating alone with loneliness, but it can be an opportunity for mindfulness. Without distractions, you can actually taste your food, enjoy the ambiance, and tune into your thoughts. Treat it like a date with yourself—try a new café, cook something special at home, or even light a candle just for you.
Going Out Alone: Freedom to Choose. Ever had a night out where no one could agree on where to go? When you go out alone—whether to a movie, a concert, or a restaurant—you have the freedom to experience what you want without compromise. Plus, being comfortable in your own presence exudes confidence, and you might even meet interesting people along the way.
Traveling Alone: Ultimate Independence. Solo travel isn’t just about seeing new places—it’s about seeing what you’re capable of. Planning your own itinerary, making your own choices, and being fully present in your surroundings can be life-changing. You’re not waiting for someone else to say yes to your dream trip—you’re making it happen for yourself.
Living Alone: Creating a Space That’s Yours. Living alone can feel daunting at first, but it’s also an opportunity to build a space that reflects you without compromise. It allows you to cultivate a deep sense of self-reliance and find joy in your own routines. You get to decide the soundtrack of your home, the energy of your space, and the rhythm of your days.
How to Shift Your Mindset and Enjoy Solitude
Reframe “Alone” as “Independent” – Instead of seeing solo experiences as evidence of loneliness, view them as acts of self-sufficiency. You are choosing to enjoy life on your terms.
Practice Gratitude for Your Own Company – Notice what you love about doing things alone. Maybe it’s the peace, the ability to make spontaneous decisions, or the chance to reconnect with your own thoughts.
Romanticize the Experience – Buy yourself flowers. Dress up for no one but yourself. Create a solo adventure list. Make it something to celebrate.
Use Alone Time for Self-Discovery – Without external distractions, you have the space to check in with yourself. What do you truly enjoy? What makes you feel at peace?
Balance Solitude with Connection – Loving your alone time doesn’t mean isolating yourself. Make sure to nurture friendships and social connections while still valuing your independence.
Recognizing Loneliness & How to Combat It
While solitude can be enriching, it’s also important to recognize when alone time turns into isolation. Signs of loneliness might include feeling down, craving interaction but avoiding it, or experiencing a loss of motivation.
If that happens:
Reach out to a friend, even if it’s just a quick check-in.
Engage in a social activity that feels low-pressure, like a group class or community event.
Try co-working spaces or coffee shops if you work from home to add passive social connection.
Practice self-compassion. It’s okay to feel lonely sometimes—it doesn’t mean you’re failing, just that you’re human.
Life Doesn’t Stop When You’re Alone
If you find yourself doing more things alone, it doesn’t mean life is on hold. It means you have the opportunity to make it entirely yours. When you shift from viewing solitude as a limitation to seeing it as empowerment, a whole new world opens up.
So go ahead—take yourself out to dinner, book that solo trip, and fill your days with things that make you happy. Because the most important relationship you’ll ever have is the one you have with yourself.
Always with love,
~ La Fille d'Ennui
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